Ridley Scott-Type Love

Need an ideal gift for a lover, fuggle or stranger ‘stalkee’?

Got one that’s guaranteed to (literally) show some love: an Android mobile device.

A curious survey found on Match.com (*ignorance*I wasn’t there*ignorance*) has shown that Android users are more likely to put out on the first date.

The Stats:

– 62% of Android owners will have sex after one date.

– (By comparison) 57% of iPhone users and 48 percent of BlackBerry owners said they’ve punched coochie on the first date.

– Android users are also more likely than owners of other handsets to toot it and boot it #YG400, with 55% saying they’d have a one-night stand.

– Normalised scores suggest that Android owners like to rock their creep swag online too. Match said a whopping 72% have visited online dating sites *ignorance*, while 58% of iPhone users and 50% of BlackBerry owners have done the same.

– If you want to put a ring on a co-worker, you might want to look for someone who owns an iPhone. Match learned that these users are the most inclined to date someone in the workplace, with nearly a quarter reporting that they’ve dated coworker in the last five years.

– Apple iPhone users don’t ascribe to the “three day rule” of dating, either; they tend to wait just a day to make contact after a date, while Android and BlackBerry users generally wait between two and three days LOL.

– BlackBerry users seem to fall fast; 67% reported that they’ve experienced love at first site. They’re also more prone to drink on a date, with 72% saying that often have at least one drink on the first outing.

So in summary, iPhone users are complicated, Blackberry users are trying too hard and Android users fxcking you tonight.

SEXT.SEXT.SEXT.SEXT.FAP.FAP.FAP.FAP.

All fears can be cast aside, for the machines will takeover.

And it will be sex, love and pain #tankshit.


 

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